One step forward, 2 steps back

God.  How did I end up in this spot again?

I look back over my pathetic sad little blog and see that the progress I had made in the past few months is gone.. I am back to where I started.

After I texted the ex, I ended up calling a friend that night for a late night pep talk and told her the whole story... After a restless sleep I got up and felt sick from worry... The ex ended up texting me saying I was over reacting and had been sleeping.. which I think was a lie.  He said he was going into a meeting and would talk to me later.  Kinda cold.

Anyhow, I ended up texting my friend to thank her for listening to me.. and started discussing another drama going on in my life.  Long story short, I accidentally texted the ex a portion of it where I was talking about confronting someone... WELL, he assumed I was talking about him... So yes, I somehow managed to make the situation even worse... if that was possible.

I sent him a message on FB to clarify the situation as to not bother him at work.. and to no surprise of mine, received no answer there or a call... and nothing today.

He, once again, is gone. 

I just finished reading another book, and one blurb rung out to me.. "Life is so unfair and painful and love is hard to find and you have to take it whenever and wherever you can get it, no matter how brief or how it ends...."

While I think his intentions were not entirely based on love, mine were.  For a few weeks, I was 'home'..

And now?  Now.. I am not so sure where I am or where I will end up.. I can promise you I will not continue to write 'poor me' blogs, as no one wants to read that.. My pain is my own cross to bear, and so it shall be...