Christmas

                  Merry Christmas to all of you!

Best wishes for an amazing holiday season with your loved ones! 

I have been very blessed over the past weekend and the next week to celebrate with my wonderful friends and family!  I couldn't ask for more.

Enjoy!

Callings

In the past few months I connected with a stranger over Instagram.

Odd?  Really, no, not in this day and age. 

I joined Instagram to share my own random photos and while surfing images of Mazatlan (where I have fond memories) I came across a 20 something fellow who has been living there for close to a year serving with the Christian organization YWAM.

The two of us will 'like' each others photos and add the odd comment - which brings me to my point (and yes, I do have one) - he posted an image of a drawing of India and commented that he seeing this image brought on a strange desire to serve there.  I commented that 'He works in mysterious ways'.. My instagram friend agreed and asked if *I* was being called anywhere...

It made me think.

While my life really isn't conducive to travelling the world, I enjoy it... but WHAT am I being 'called' to do?

2012 has been the year of knocking down/clearing out so much in my life.  I have gained some new friendships and closed the door on some negative old ones.. While I have really struggled with some of the most heart wrenching moments in my life I have also grown as a person.

What am I being called to do?  Right now, I feel deep inside of me that I am being called to live.

Just live.

I have spent too much time in the past worrying.  Worrying about what other people think.  Worrying about money.  Worrying about time.  Just worrying.

I'm tired of worry holding me back from living.

Like the rest of the world, I watched in horror and disbelief at the chaos that unfolded in Sandy Hook this past Friday.  I cried with the world at the loss of 26 people - the majority being children who will never have the chance to live.

What if I were to be on my last day?  Would I be content with what I have done in my life?  No.. No I wouldn't...

I am being called to LIVE in 2013.

How? Little things.  I want to go back to Mazatlan.  I may do this ALONE.  I want to visit the sites my Instagram friend posts about.  Now, I am not silly - I know solo travel to Mexico being a single female is not smart - I do have my good friend D living out there still.. I wouldn't BE alone, but I would be traveling there ALONE.  Going away by myself would actually be HUGE for myself... but more to come on that..

Point being, I am going stop worrying and start living - as that is what I am called to do!

Kicking the habit

Today is officially my ONE YEAR anniversary for having quit smoking!!

It's funny - I didn't WANT to quit smoking, I just knew I needed to for my health and for my wallet..  I enjoyed smoking and struggled to see myself being able to quit... but I did it1

Do I still think of smoking?  Yes.
Do I still MISS smoking?  Occasionally.

I notice now that I am aware of the smell of cigarette smoke on others and it disgusts me... but to be honest, I still strangely crave it on occasion...

Do I feel any different? Yes.

The first few months I didn't notice feeling any different.. but now, I notice my lungs feel better.. When I exercise, I don't get that 'burning' feeling any longer... And believe it, it was not lost on me that I would leave the gym after a really intense workout and light a cigarette...

The few colds I have gotten haven't resulted in chest colds as they would have years past...

My skin looks better.. My teeth are whiter.. the circles under my eyes less...  I just FEEL better.

I know that staying quit will continue to be a challenge but I have made it through the first year!